Jewish Life #41. Beresjiet serie 25: Like fish

From a Jewish perspective, there are several challenges for a human being; a) self-realization and maintaining a unique identity, a healthy self-esteem b) meaningful intimate relationships with others, and c) a living relationship with Hashem, our Creator.
 
The story of Yosef, his father Yakov and his brothers is described most extensively in most length and detail in Beresjiet, the first book of the Torah. In this we cover, in short, the topic of a healthy self-esteem. 
 
In a commentary of Rashi on Beresjiet 48:15-16, we read: ‘And he [Jaakov] blessed Joseph and said, ‘God, before Whom my fathers, Abraham and Isaac, walked, God Who has befriended me as long as I am alive, until this day, may the angel who redeemed me from all harm bless the youths, and may they be called by my name and the name of my fathers, Abraham and Isaac, and may they multiply abundantly like fish, in the midst of the land.’
 
Rashi on Genesis 48:16 comments on the word ‘fish’. According to Rashi, fish are unaffected by the evil eye. The Talmud famously explains that fish in the ocean are covered by water so that the evil eye does not affect them.[1] Rav Kook teaches us that the evil eye are those social pressures by others, often communicated with stares and glares, winks or winces. Fish, living under the waves, are unmoved by these social influences. Yosef, Rav Kook comments, was similarly self-assured and determined. He was a man of a strong sense of self and with a healthy self-esteem. Yosef persisted in his brother’s rejection and aggression, resisted the temptation of Potiphar’s wife, and his imprisonment in the jail of pharaoh. 
 
Yaakov blessed his grandsons to be like Yosef, to be like fish in the sea. 
 
In clinical psychology, a healthy self-esteem is part of a healthy structure of a person. The other part is the quality of social relationships. A strong personality is able to maintain his unique self, not to be affected by social pressures, and at the same time able to establish and maintain meaningful relationships with others. He is able to balance and harmonize the ‘I’ and the ‘We’. 
A low self-esteem often hamstrings us, keeps us from success in life, above all: a healthy balance between the self and social relationships. For personal religious growth, self-esteem is crucial. We are all made in His image. Whoever believes in themselves will flourish, like Yosef did, as a fish covered by water and unaffected by the evil eye.
 
[1] Berachot 20a.

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